and sometimes it's just damn hard

First of all, I want to say I LOVE being a Mummy, I wouldn't change anything in my life.

Sometimes I feel as though I'm all alone in this. Yes, Stu & I are together, but it's ME who does all the parenting. Me who gets up at 2 am to put her paci back in. Me who gets up at 5am when she decides she wants a bottle. Me who gets up to her in the morning. Me who gives her all her bottles. Me who changes all her nappies. Me who tries to get her to sleep each day. Me who tries to ease the pain of teething.

It's so frustrating, I love Gaby more than anything in the world, but I want a BREAK.... An hour here & there to go to the mall, to go for a walk, to go & get a coffee, to sleep, to read my book... but do I get it? No. Stu's excuse is that he isn't 'confident' enough with her. I can understand that, BUT the only way he can get more confidence, is to play more of a role in the parenting & day to day caring - but does he do that? NO.

I love Stu, but that doesn't make this any easier! Sometimes I want to shake him, until he realises, that he has to use his initiative. It drives me crazy when I have to ask him to pick Gaby up when she's crying, and when the crying gets too much for him, he'll just put her back in her rocker. I don't think he realises how much I have to do during the day, and just how time consuming it IS caring for a little one. The only time I really get to myself is when Gaby is asleep - and those hours are getting less & less as she gets older!!!!

Being a Mum, I can't exactly just 'give up', or 'leave'..... unlike him. I don't have the luxury of running away when I want to....

.... Not that I want to run away from Gaby... I love her way too much